BRIAN BUHLER

A typical spiritual direction session is 60 minutes. The frequency in meeting is usually monthly, though a less frequent rhythm is possible.  In each session the directee is responsible to bring something to the table.  This could be anything at all: a challenge at work, at home, or in their personal life.  More often than not, the topic brought to the session will eventually lead to how God is being encountered in the directee’s prayer life regardless of the challenge or season of life they find themselves in.  Directee’s may come to a session during a season of consolation where anxiety levels are low and God’s peace and presence are palpable.  The directee and director celebrate this season and discern the hand of God in it. Conversely, a directee may come for direction in a season of desolation where God’s presence seems distant and prayer feels unfruitful. There may be an unexplainable angst that simply needs to be brought into the discussion for the purpose of discerning God’s voice in the midst of the darkness or felt “absence”.  

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The primary posture of the spiritual director is listening.  Directors often refer to the three-fold listening that happens in a session.  The director listens to their directee, to God, and to what’s happening in their own heart.  Because listening requires time, the pace of a spiritual direction session is slow and unhurried.  Moments of silence are welcomed.  There is no pressure to give the “right answer” or “solve the problems” of the directee.  The spiritual direction session is purposefully un-therapeutic.  Though therapy, counseling, and coaching are all valuable practices, spiritual direction is different.  Its focus is strictly the directee’s present relationship with God.Spiritual direction is most fruitful when the one receiving spiritual direction has a genuine desire to hear from God and respond in obedience.